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Safety Articles by our own Mr. Safety, John Knickerbocker

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Born to Take Care of Your Bike (sung to the tune “Born to Be Wild” by Steffenwolf)

​John Knickerbocker - 2024 Safety Officer, October 2024

Get your motor runnin', Head out on the highway 
Go back to the ga-rage, And change your fluids all the way

Yeah, darlin' Gonna make it happen, Lubricate with a love embrace Going through the whole thing TLOCS, And find a good space 
A place no smoke or lightnin', Or heavy metal thunder 
Or racing in the wind, Use a cover, put it under

Yeah, darlin' Gonna make it happen, Clean and shine to avoid the rust

. . .

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The HEART of the Matter is Getting Ready to Ride

​John Knickerbocker - 2024 Safety Officer, February 2024

Live, from Sun City West Arizona, It’s your favorite safety guy, Pump Heartly!

A HEARTy Hello to Wolf River HOG members! It’s already February. Do you believe it? February has Super Bowl Sunday, Marti Gras, Ash Wednesday, Presidents’ Day, and of course, Valentine’s Day. Did you know February 4th is National Hemp Day? Make some brownies or something. The third week is International Flirting Week. Feb-ruary is Black History Month and it’s American HEART Month. YES! If you want to find out all the special days and weeks, and monthly celebrations in February, you can check out the National Day Calendar website at https://www.nationaldaycalendar.com/ . Friday was Ground Hog’s Day. Jimmy the Ground-hog in Sun Prairie did not see his shadow. That means an early Spring is expected. - Read more

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Don’t Celebrate Too Hard

​John Knickerbocker - 2023 Safety Officer, May 2023

Hey man! It’s me, Jonny Chong. You remember me from all those movies and TV shows with Cheech, don’t ya? Oh wait. That was my long-lost cousin Tommy Chong. Never mind.

Hey, don’t you love a good celebration? I’m a dedicated party animal myself. And as luck would have it, May brings not two, but four, wait, no. What comes between two and four? Anyway, there’s Women Riders’ Month, International Female Ride Day, and Wisconsin Motorcycle Awareness Month! WAHOO!
 

Women Riders’ Month is a blast. When it comes to... - Read more

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State of Motorcycling and Traffic Safety Address

​John Knickerbocker - 2023 Safety Officer, January 2023

From the office of the Wolf River HOG Chapter Safety Officer, here is his yearly address concerning the state of motorcycling and traffic safety in Wisconsin.


“Mr. Director, Assistant Director, Secretary, Treasurer, Other Officers, Members, Associate Members, Honored Guests, and just plain guests. I am with you in spirit today (I am wearing shorts and bicycling in 60-degree weather in Arizona. Sorry!), to share with you the state of motorcycling as it concerns the Wolf River HOG Chapter and beyond... - Read more

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Don't Be Lost Out in the Cold

​John Knickerbocker - 2022 Safety Officer, December 2022

There you were driving home at night in that nasty blizzard when some dipstick pulled out in front of you. You did what you could to avoid a collision and wound up sliding into deep snow in the ditch as the other driver sped away unaware of what just happened to you. After a few choice words and a “Hail Mary” for not getting killed, you attempted to get out of the ditch, but found you were stuck so deep, you couldn’t open your door. On the radio revealed the highway you were on was being closed due to the severe weather. Most folks would have broken down and cried. But you were one of the smart drivers out there. You were prepared with your winter safety kit... - Read more

It's February, Start Getting Your Body Ready to Ride

John Knickerbocker - 2014 Safety Officer, February 2014

 

You remember Hans and Frans, the personal trainers of the stars on Saturday Night Live. They made the phrase “PUMP YOU UP” famous. Well, they were busy this year helping celebrities get in shape to watch the Super Bowl. So they asked me, their 3rd cousin, Johns to PUMP YOU UP for the riding season.

 

Punxsutawney Phil, the famed groundhog predicts 6 more weeks of winter. But when you do start to ride, nothing is more nasty, or unsafe than sore wrists, arms, legs, and shoulders, an aching bottom, and getting tired way too fast. That’s all for girlie men and softy women. If you start now, we can PUMP YOU, UP...

The Cat in the Hat Gets Ready to Ride  ( A Safety Officer's Ode to Dr. Suess )
John Knickerbocker - 2013 Safety Officer

Our Dr. Suess, alas he’s gone,

But rhymes we must keep carrying on.

‘Cause know that spring, is nearly here.

Down winding roads, we’ll want to steer.

We love to ride, of that we’re certain.

And to avoid, that final curtain, ...

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